14 September 2006

True Is It That We Have Seen Better Days

The day started with a frantic call from Val, the woman on whose farm most of our animals board. One of David's girls delivered a stillborn cria - textbook normal delivery, but the little bugger never took a breath. These things, of course, happen, and we were far more concerned for the dam and for Val's state of mind, as she really tends to take these things to heart.

I had to run a couple errands, one of which was now to stop by the local bakery to get a loaf of chocolate bread to take to Val. I'm a Southerner, after all. It's what we do when there's been a death.

So we drove up to the farm, consoled Val, looked over both baby (premature but fairly good size) and mom (looking normal) and took baby and placenta to the New Hampshire state diagnostic laboratory for post-mortem to sort out whether there was a major congenital problem or possibly an infectious agent that would be a concern for the rest of the herd. The pathologist called us with a diagnosis no more than a couple hours later: congenital diaphragmatic hernia. Its not a problem I've seen described in 'pacas before, but there's no way this baby could have lived. The pathologist also e-mailed me photos, and the lungs were extremely tiny - about half the size of the heart.

This evening was spent giving a plasma transfusion to little Herreshoff, who has been having diarrhea and fever over the past week. He's also been started on antibiotics now and the fever's responding, so hopefully he will do well and shake this off quickly.

Other Sad News

I found out tonight that former Texas governor Ann Richards passed away. She was a pistol of a woman, and I always admired the hell out of her. Texas did themselves (and ultimately the rest of the nation) a real disservice when they booted her in favor of W.

And the Good News Is...

...my main errand this morning was to sign and have notarized the paperwork to get the house in Pittsburgh transferred over completely to S. He still has a bit more to go in paying me off, but at least the end is in sight for having our financial entanglements completely unentangled.

I was a bit annoyed that I was expected to foot the expense for overnighting the paperwork back to his lawyer. I lost money selling my house in North Carolina to be with him (so I could be lied to and cheated on and ultimately dumped - all ostensibly for not being "hot" enough), I agreed to being paid a conservative estimate of the money I'd put into the house in Pittsburgh that didn't account for the appreciation in its market value, I incurred all the expenses of moving and starting over (even though he had agreed to pay half my moving expenses - but what's one more broken promise), and then they expect me to pay even more. Granted, it wasn't a huge sum, but I was kind of feeling like I'd paid enough for him already - in more ways than one.

So I thought about lodging a protest over it, but ultimately I figured I'm better off letting it go. I'm certainly better off without people like that in my life, so the sooner it's all done with the happier I'll be. And if the price of freedom is $14.40, then so be it.


Anonymous said...

I'm sorry to hear about the baby. But, I'm glad to hear it wasn't due to anything that could affect the rest of the animals.

As for having to pay - $14.40 is a small price to pay to be done with it all! Sounds like he wasn't a very nice person and you are much better off with him totally out of your life!

When Pigs Fly bread - YUMMY (although I didn't know they had chocolate bread!)

Cheryl said...

Very wise of you, sometimes it's easier (on your heart and mind, if not your wallet) to pay the money and go your own way.

I'm so sorry about the little cria, how sad.

Barbara said...

When I was breeding Mastiffs, I didn't have the money for post-mortems on the little ones that didn't make it, or were born dead - I always wondered why they died. I know that it's probably small consolation to understand the reason.

As for having to pay - it's so worth it to have that last little piece out of the way. It's hard to feel like you have been taken advantage of over and over again - even to this last little thing.

Your life today sounds so much healthier and heart rich (full of love). There was something you needed to learn by being with S. - aren't you glad you learned it and can now move on to a different lesson?


knittingboykit said...

Blessings to you, Mel, and to David and Val as well. You are so good to be the Southern gent and take Val food--and chocolate at that!


Dena said...

I'm so sad to hear about Ann Richards. Getting to hear her speak was one of the highlights of living in Austin, TX. I'll miss her.

Anonymous said...

Sad news about the lost cria.

I'll miss Ann Richards, too. There just aren't enough like her in politics. Or anywhere else, for that matter.

Congrats on cutting a major tie to the ex!

Anonymous said...

I still think you should have had the pittsburgh house assessed for market value. And split the new difference. S is probably laughing all the way to the bank... where the amount he put into it has probably doubled, at least, in value. S will be able to pay it off... better to let him spend long hours at his office working to pay you off, then for you to just walk away, me thinks. He owes you.

Tallguy said...

Even though you expect to have a couple of losses when raising animals, it still is a sad time when you do lose one. Hope the mother is feeling okay. Hard on her too!

Yes, lessons in life sometimes do cost a bit. But it's only money, after all. Best cut all ties, and go on with new adventures! Remember that S. will get what's due him in time. It works like that. And so will you!!

Chris said...

Argh - I hate things like that, the sort of niggling ongoing annoyance involved in dealing with certain people... at least you will be free soon??

JoVE said...

One piece of advice: GET A COHABITATION AGREEMENT. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200. Do not say that this time it will be different. Have the difficult conversation and spend your lawyer money getting everything you and David have agreed in writing NOW while you are still madly in love with each other. The worst thing that could happen is that you live happily ever after and regret spending the money on lawyers. (or maybe that is the BEST thing that could happen. I'm confused.)

There is information at the Alternatives to Marriage Project website at www.unmarried.org. We had a board meeting this weekend and one of the other board members (a lawyer) was going on about this a bit. No brainer. And he is right. You've seen where not having one gets you.

That sounds very bossy (and it is) but I trust you know it is because I want my family to be well taken care of :-)