Rhinebeck Blogger Bingo is on again this year, and we jumped at the chance to be headquarters again. So follow the link on over to Stitchy's place to get the 4-1-1 on signing up. I already asked if I could be center square like Paul Lynde.
So a month after David e-mailed his mother and sister to inform them of our wedding plans, and two months after he informed his father, his parents finally got around to sending him individual letters in response. Along with a Bible tract, of course. You can imagine the content.
His mother's letter resorted to the old, discredited Freudian argument and blamed it on his father not being around enough (I told David he should write her and point out that she left out the domineering mother part). Then a lot of the same old bigoted and intentionally inaccurate "research" put out by Paul Cameron and his ilk. Or as she put it, "several in the scientific community," which I think means 3 or 4 whack jobs.
His father's letter proclaimed himself and David's mother as "God's representatives" to David, cited a few Bible verses, and then the tired "you can choose to change" argument. He finished it off with two questions - "Are you happy?" and "Do you want to change?" I think the answers are not what he's hoping to hear.
I know that in their minds they're doing the right and loving thing, but it's just so profoundly dysfunctional (David's sister's response last week was in a similar vein - "The kids are great. You're going to Hell. Love you."). It pisses me off, too, because they've been rehashing the same old crap for the last 16 years and just refuse to see that it's hurtful and accomplishes nothing.
The other issue is that I know that the main reason they're being as difficult as they are right now is that I'm an unavoidable part of the picture. As long as David wasn't cohabiting or in a serious relationship, it was easy for them to walk around with blinders on and pretend not to know anything. My presence spoils that for them, so they see me, naturally, as a threat. Which, of course, means that I can't engage them like I'm itching to do, since it would only justify their view of me as the meddling outsider.
At least I know where we won't be for the holidays this year.